I see it happen all the time.
Here’s a simple “truth” about your man that he will never admit to you:
If he believes that men are falling all over themselves trying to be with you, he will instinctively step up to “win you” for himself.
However, if he believes he’s already won you, he might not feel much of an urgency to commit.
This is why it’s SO important to “up” your perceived value.
A man will claim that which he perceives as valuable if it is within his means or ability to do so. When a man finds a woman whom he perceives as valuable, one whom he feels is within his means to “win”, he will go after what he wants and claim her for his own, guarding his treasure jealously, for she is his treasure.
The more aware he is of how valuable you seem in the eyes of his competition, the more likely he will be to want you for himself.
HINT – A woman’s appeal and allure have everything to do with how she sees herself and how well she allows masculine energy to flow towards her. Please follow my blog if you would like to learn more about this.
Have you ever observed a child wanting to play with a toy that another child is playing with, simply because the other child has the toy…even though there are other, maybe even “better” toys he could play with, but he wants THAT toy? It doesn’t matter that the toy sat on the shelf practically unnoticed for over a year. Now it’s suddenly the object of everyone’s desire.
The concept of female attraction is similar with men.
A man will often step up to claim a woman if he senses that she’s the woman every man wants to be with. The urgency kicks in when he realizes that if he doesn’t claim her for himself, someone else will and he will miss out.
A word of caution: Trying to “up your perceived value” in a man’s eyes can and will totally backfire if you make the common mistakes. There’s a very right way and a very wrong wayto go about it.
For instance, a man can easily sense when you’re trying to provoke jealousy. Trying to make him jealous doesn’t work. Moreover, if you’re trying to work out any kind of strategy to get him to commit, you’d better be extremely stealthy, and even the stealthiest of strategies usually fail miserably.
There is a quaint little cafe down the street from my office that I like to have lunch at several times a week. It’s in a small-town community. Lots of old-timers and working “blue collar” types go there for lunch. I can usually be found keeping to myself in my little corner of the main dining room, although the regulars all know me by name.
One day, while sitting at my table, eating my lunch, reading my book and minding my own business, a man from the town hall municipal building whom I had met recently while on a business-related errand approached my table and asked if he could join me.
That evening with my boyfriend over dinner, I reenacted my comedic “lunch date” story. I painted the awkward picture of me buried in my book when suddenly he was standing at the chair across from me, already pulling it out, before I even had a chance to react.
I expalined how, naturally, I didn’t have the heart to say “no” at the risk of embarrassing the poor guy…so, instead of enjoying my usual quiet solitude, I listened to stories of a ruined marriage, alienated teen, and his new-found faith in the Lord.
Eventually, my hour was up, so I said the usual pleasantries and started to reach for the check so I could pay my tab and leave. He snagged it out of my hand and insisted that lunch was on him.
“How forward of him!” my boyfriend said with a hint of disgust.
“I know right!?! It was sooooooo awkward!”
Awkward lunch companion was henceforth known as “City Guy”.
That wasn’t the last time that City Guy made his moves. I managed to avoid any future unsolicited lunch dates, but being such a small town, random City Guy encounters were bound to happen occasionally, and I always got a kick out of sharing the stories with my boyfriend.
“You’ll never guess who I saw today…” *boyfriend groans curiously*
It wasn’t that my boyfriend was jealous or felt threatened, but naturally he didn’t enjoy thinking of City Guy encroaching on his territory either. One time my boyfriend actually drove all the way (an hour) to have lunch with me at the cafe, hoping that City Guy would be there and just “happen” to see me with my (clearly better-than-him) boyfriend. City Guy wasn’t there, but it did get the regulars talking.
Point is, I always mentioned the flirtations I received from men (not just City Guy), but any such stories were always delivered humorously, without any “intention” behind them. I didn’t share a story trying to push his jealous button.
Coupled with a consistent habit of making him feel like my hero, he ended up putting a very sparkly engagement ring on my finger that he said “should swat a few flies.”
It worked for me, it will work for you, too, if you’re awesome (and you know it) and you know how to let masculine energy flow towards you.
Love, Carrie xoxo
p.s. Sometimes all you need is a little coaching to help nudge you (or shove you, whichever the case may be) in the right direction from someone who really knows how this game called “love” is played. Let me help you “up your perceived value” with a little coaching and tools that have been proven time and time again to make you irresistible and magnetic to ANY man.