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When He Feels "Emotional Attraction" With You

I was recently contacted by a woman who was terribly upset because her man had just told her he loved her but didn’t always feel attracted to her. 

My heart sank for her because I know what it feels like to hear those words. 

The sting of those words wasn’t lessened by the fact that he was openly sharing about a conversation he’d had the prior evening with an old long-lost lady pal. 

As we began to peel back the layers of what happened, I could hear right away that he was a mature, thoughtful and loving partner, and that their relationship was clearly based on openness and honesty.  No matter to her, because hearing those words felt like a dagger through her heart and her most sacred dream – to be truly loved

All she could hear was “I’m unlovable…No one will ever marry me.”

In fact, she was so focused on his “sometimes I’m not attracted to you” comment that she almost entirely missed the compliment he was trying to communicate to her: 

“Darling, I wish you could have been a fly on the wall so you could hear how I sang your praises all night.  I told her all about you and how much I adore you.”

Physical Attraction Vs. Emotional Attraction

There’s no doubt that she first caught his attention with her natural feminine beauty.  She’s a woman who takes care of herself.  Whether she’s dressed up or wearing a jeans and a ball cap, she’s got the physical attraction part down without even trying. 

Her success in the business world has given her an air of confidence that comes natural to her now.  She knows what she’s capable of and she knows how it feels to be sought after.   She’s never been one to settle for less than what she wants.

So then, what was the message he was trying to communicate?  We find the answer to this by going back to the beginning.

I asked her to describe to me what the circumstances were like in her life around the time they met so I could get a picture of his initial attraction.  He was captivated by her free spirit – her love of nature, animals, and the joy she emanated when she was doing the things that fulfilled her sense of purpose and calling.  He fell in love with her inner beauty.   He was drawn to the feeling of peace and calm he felt in her presence. 

This is the kind of attraction that creates a lasting heart connection.

Operating In Goddess Mode

There is nothing more important for you as a woman on your journey than finding your purpose and fulfilling your unique potential

It is necessary because when we pour our energy into our purpose, we get to feel so many incredible feelings.  Attractive feelings!  This is what operating in Goddess Mode is about.

We each have an inherent longing within us that calls out to our purpose.  There is no limit concerning your purpose and it can even change, morph or evolve many times throughout your life. 

The Key To Creating Emotional Attraction

Nurture your life path – your purpose, whatever that may be, whether a career, hobby, or mixture of things, with intention and loving energy.  No pressure here – simply allow your energy to flow towards what you love and what you want to manifest.

If you are blocking this energy, your intimate relationship with your man could also be blocked.

NOTE:  If you find yourself wanting to focus on your relationship, I urge you to find yourself in the other things you love.  Focusing on a man will not help him create emotional attraction for you.


Ponder the following questions and access your feelings:

  1. How do you feel when you’re doing something you’re really good at?


  1. If you could do anything you wanted, what would it be?  What would it feel like?


  1. What’s your favorite pastime or hobby?  What feelings come up for you when engaged in this activity?


I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again… A man will fall in love with a woman as she falls in love with herself.

Love & light,


PS - How is your love life going?  Are you currently seeing someone special and want to take it to the next level?  Are you just starting out on the dating scene?   If you're ready to go from single to blissfully engaged (or partnered) I can help. Let's connect!



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