Understanding What Makes a Man Want to Walk Away…And What Makes Him Want to Stay
Last Saturday, my husband, Paul, and I spent most of the day outside dealing with “Leafmageddon”. It was time. Most of the trees have defoliated by now and what leaves hadn’t found their way to the pool were in huge piles at every entrance to our house, just waiting to get inside.
We were about 90% of the way done with the backyard when Paul announced that he was just about out of energy for the backyard and would be moving on to tackle the front momentarily.
“What? Noooo…are you sure we’re done?” I whined.
“Yeah, I’m done.”
“But, but, but Sweetie…I was going for more of an Al & Dian look.” (Al and Dian are the neighbors with the impeccable yard whom we aspire to be like one day.)
After a pause, he looked at me and said, “Hey, how come women get to have “Honey...
When He Stops Trying… DO THIS:
This is the 2nd part of an email I received from “Lauren”, who wanted help understanding what she was doing wrong with men.
In a recent post titled “Avoid This Common Pitfall in Dating and Inspire Him to Win You” I talked about how to keep from losing yourself and your identity when you become involved in a relationship.
Lauren wanted to know:
“Should I have no expectations? Be completely independent and close my heart so that I don’t get hurt again? But if I’m completely independent then what is the point of being in a relationship?”
Expectations can be tricky. Happiness starts with giving up the need to place expectations on others. Freedom is so much better!
Freeing your man from expectations allows him to show up however he chooses.
“The Magic of Appreciation”…and 5 Ways to Show It.
There’s no other feeling in the world like the feeling of being appreciated. Even for the mundane “everyday things” in life. Even for the things we’re “supposed to do”. When we feel appreciated we naturally want to do more — give more.
Being the “giving” energy partner in the relationship, men really thrive upon our appreciation. The more we appreciate them, the more they instinctively want to give. It’s in their nature to give to us.
And yet, so often we withhold our appreciation. Why do we do this?
Do we fall into a way of expectation or complacency?
Do we fear somehow that lavishing too much praise will make us weak and vulnerable?
Do we fail to see what we ought to appreciate because we are too focused on what we DON’T have, rather than what we should be thankful for?
Are we too busy criticizing him to appreciate him?
Here’s a letter from Candace who is struggling with something many of us can identify with. She wants to know how to save her marriage and get her husband to be attracted to her again:
“I’m so fed up with my husband. I can’t seem to get through to him. Every time I try to talk to him about our marriage, he doesn’t listen to me, and he doesn’t seem to care. I’m so tired of being the only one making the effort. I’m tired of being disrespected. He doesn’t seem to want me or even want to be around me anymore. He doesn’t seem to be attracted to me, even though I do everything I can to take care of myself. I think I look great for my age. I think I look better than most women my age. I think other men think so, too. But he doesn’t even seem to notice.
I’m worried because I think he may be considering leaving me. It feels like he’s...